got back both h1 papers today.
i passed GP and BIO! ><
though the results are not fantastic, but at least i tried hard and passed it!
i realised that i did meet my target of all D's and above..
except for MATHS... ...
jas said that she got a shocked when she knw my math result.
u think i didnt get a shocked?
well. its all over i guess.
went to minds cafe with xy, ms and jas.
met twins, yan, charlene and xm.
haha. i thot i wouldnt meet them.
since ning said she reserved a place and i thot she wld take the 2nd sty
haha. maybe its fated.
my stupid printer dosent even wna let me print the rjc paper.
argh! i guess maths isnt my forte now. Zzz
i cant even do the qn. hias.
buck up! i cant let myself be dissapointed anymore!

emo-ed today when i got back my maths paper.
the U grade is staring straight into my face!
i felt as though i was dead. i didnt expect this grade.
though i knew i might fail, but i didnt knw it would be this bad.
and the worst thing is that i DID study!
wanted to cry but i thot forget abt it. lols
the results are not worth it. my tears are very precious!
got back econs in the afternoon. it was alright.
and it smoothes my emotion a little. lols
went to far east with twins. but i lost the mood to shop...
maybe its my maths results or simply issit becoz i'm broke?
i don't know...
a bit senseless today. keep bringing them to the wrong direction.
went to mindscafe. played serveral games=)
the best thing is not the game, but the bonding session tt we had. =D
well, i preferred charade of coz. it was super FUN!
and i know i'm bad at 1st impression...lols
played and train-ed home.
i hope the games has cheered up aman coz she didnt score well either.
and i hope the twins wldnt mind the super early celebration=P
oh. not to forget the mooncake in replacement for bdae cake! haha
i hope it tastes nice=P
went to fb and i think this message from GOD is just right for me.

There is nothing ''out there'' that's holding you down, - you are limiting yourself only wit...h your own imagination. And your greatest limits are not even the ''cannot'' and the ''should not'', but the places where your imagination hasn't yet gone at all. There has never been a better time for you to open your eyes, let the imagination soar and see what more is possible.

yeah. nothing is holding me back apart from myself. I simply have to strive for the results that i wished for. its time to get serious...

today is a SUPER tiring day! lols
did bio p1 in the morning and i nearly fell aslp during the paper!
got back chem result...
the results arent bad but i'm sure i could do better!
so many stupid careless mistake! argh!
esp the functional grp ester which i spelt as esther! LOLS
this is the stupidest mistake i can ever have!
went out with wynee to shop for gifts.
and we both ended up so tired that we couldnt continue walking!
and both of us saw so many things that we were tempted to buy!
argh! why i dont have enough money?!? lols
so sian lar. cant buy anything after spendin 100 bucks today.
but for friends, its worth it. ^^
went to celebrate ms and sh birthday at pizza hut today
had a great laugh thanks to gg and edna!
went back and go all the way to jy and cy hse to get their bdae msg.
oh man, i'm so tired now! lol
still have to print econs notes and do the acjc paper! =(
life is always hard isnt it? ...

went out with xt,qr and jel today.
haha. i was thinking how come we were meeting at hg.
and in the end i realised that it has been long since the 3 of them went to hg!
cause no one knows that there is a pizza hut there. lols
the funniest thing is that the 4 of us stood in front of pizza hut,
and spent like half an hour to decide what to eat. lols
in the end we ended up in pepper lunch. lols
chat n chat. iu sudd realise that my world is very simple compared to theirs.
haha. qr and xt's love cycle is very complicated!
and i was telling jel it's tougher to understand compared to bio! haha
i start to realise the importance of leading a simple life^^
after dinner we were thinking of wher to go.
so i randomly suggested jel's hse.
in the end we really went there! lols
played dai di. chit chat until 11 plus
poor xt is gonna get scolded by her sis when she get home!
i sudd realise how good my parents were. i didnt even have any phone calls frm them!
lols. we still took photos as prove that we were the ones with xt. haha
reached home at 12 and here i am, blogging.

maybe its seriously time to get serious! there isnt much time left
my first paper is on 10 nov, which means i'm left with 40+ days!
oh man. time is running out. i have to buck up. i HAVE TO!
come on mad. its time to get serious~!
i should be mugging now. i SHOULD!
come on. let me fall in love with my books! be a mugger!
i hope my results wont be bad for prelims.
i seriously dont wish to u-turn. if that happens, it is going to be the biggest failure in my life! get SERIOUS! =(

Sian...
i simply cant focus! coz i'm only left with mcq paper. lols
i feel that a lvl is hopeless.
and aman reminded me tt i am only left with erm 47 days? ><
friends wld always say you can do it!
cousins would say that i am smart so A lvl is nth to me.
well, i feel that all these comments are not useful at all!
it only adds up to my tremendous stress.
coz deep down my heart i knw people's expectation of me.
and i dont wana let them down, esp my parents.
GOD please grant me with wisdom!!!

"Each friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive, and it is only by this meeting that a new world is born."
- Anais Nin

yea! i finally ended most of my papers...
except 2 mcq^^
i'm sry if i bore you all with all my complains abt studies
i didnt wan to, but my life evolves ard studies...so...
finally i can relax a bit.
but its really A BIT! and i have to continue to strive for A lvl
sian. choices.
i made a wrong choice and ended up being so stressful.
but GOD is still good to me.
he gave me plenty of good friends. and lotsa encouragement.
though the road may be tough, but i'm determined to go on.
i got a lot of things to do after A lvl!
here is my checklist: ^^
1. SHOP TILL I DROP! i'm gonna fill my wardrobe with new clothes^^
2. SAVE UP FOR BANGKOK / MALAYSIA TRIP WITH OSLE PPL!
3. SAVE UP FOR HK TRIP WITH MY COUSINS!
4. SAVE UP FOR TAIWAN TRIP WITH TWINS AND AMAN WHEN I'M 21!
5. LEARN BAKING WITH JAS
6. LEARN DRIVING WITH OLIVIA
7. LEARN PIANO FROM CHURCH
8. FINISH WATCHING ALL MY BELOVED DRAMAS!

hmm. this shall be my wishlist for the moment. i foresee that it will grow longer in times to come. haha.

20-09-2009...
Today is the 1 year death anniversary for my grandpa.
Its seems so fast. time seems to fly isnt it?
i was still having my promo when my grandpa died abd now i'm busy preparin for prelims!
the whole family gathered at my grandma hse.
well, my mother didnt go, she chose to go and work instead...
its rather funny.
when my grandpa was alive and kicking, or during CNY,
there wasnt even a time whereby the whole family would gather together...
there would sure be some ppl missing here missing there...
but when my grandpa died, evreyone start to feel guilty...
and EVERYONE came to commemorate his death anniversary.
whats the point of doin all these after grandpa has alr been in heaven?
why do ppl always fail to treasure what they have?
nw grandma is the only elderly at home
but i dont see my uncles and aunties coming back often to visit her and to show their concern for her...
are they still gonna make the whole thing repeat again?
shldnt they start to appreciate grandma now?!?
well, i'm sure grandpa is lookin after us in heaven
because he blessed us with this opportunity to gather together.
i had a fun time meeting up with my cousins^^
anyway, they is no point crying over grandpa's death.
...

* Happy bday to MS and LEVINA! ^^
mad must continue to strive for prelims!

人，哭着喊着跑到这个世界上来，面临的首要问题就是生存。要生存，就必然遇到竞争；有竞争，就必然有压力。所以，只要你选择活着，就注定要承受生存所带来的各种各样的压力，如升学、就业、晋职等，不胜枚举，不一而足。我们只有勇于正视压力，学会承受压力，才能在日趋激烈乃至残酷的生存竞争中，永远立于不败之地。

I pondered upon this. and it got me thinking, isnt this true? that life is full of competition and only the fittest survive. since we cant do anything to change our lives, why not just accept it and make the best out of it. Even if the path that we have chosen is the wrong one, we can always find a way to make things better. If we know how to change our perspectives towards diff things, the world might be a better place with less sufferings...^^

wow...it seems sooooo long since i last blogged. lols
paiseh, was too busy with jc stuff so didnt have time to update my blog. haha
well, mainly its because my mye results is damn lousy
so i wana focus more on my studies. haha
well, i sure hope that i would be able to score well for prelims...
if not its really GG for me le.
A level is just ard the corner.
not only my friends are stressed, i'm feeling stressed up too!
stressed up because the ppl ard me all have high expectations of me
and i didnt wana let them down. i hate to make ppl feel disappointed
but sadly, i feel that i am damn stupid now
simple maths qn also need to spend hours to solve it
and i still didnt manage to pass bio and gp for my common test! argh
i'm seriously very worried abt my results even though i might look happy go lucky
part of me alr feels like giving up
coz studying has become such a torture!
well, i suppose that i can only depend on GOD for this period of time.
turn to GOD and let him resolve all these problems for me.
BUCK UP MADELINE! ^^